Tag: life

Back in the Emergency Room

Wendy K.Leave a comment

After less than a week home, my mom ended up back in the ER. The cause, hypoglycemia, extremely low blood sugar. Cancer patients suffer from loss of appetite, BUT when you are a diabetic cancer patient, things are extra challenging.

Horrific does not even begin to explain what can happen to a person going through a hypoglycemic episode. My mom was rolling around, grabbing herself, convulsing, screaming. She remembers NOTHING, but my sister and I will never be able to forget.

This time, when we called 911 right before midnight on 1/24/26, a team of 4 firefighters arrived first, followed by 2 paramedics. They checked her glucose level and it was in the 40s. The paramedics administered sugar water via an IV and she became responsive pretty soon afterwards. Even though she seemed normal, her heart rate was concerningly low. They recommended taking her to the ER.

I could not brave the hospital alone this time around. It was all so overwhelming. My husband went with me and we asked our 16 year old son to keep an eye on his younger brothers.

Fortunately, the ER doctor decided my mom did not need to be admitted. He attributed the low heart rate to new medication she had been prescribed during her last hospital stay so told me to pause that medication and after he felt her glucose levels were stabilized, he released my mom. We were home before 5am on 1/25/26.

Earlier that same day (5pm) I had gotten in an argument with my mom. She was annoyed that I was nagging her about not eating enough nutritious food. She told me that if she could eat then she would eat, but everything was making her want to vomit. She told me I wasn’t sick so I didn’t understand and asked if I thought she was intentionally not eating. I told her that obviously she was not doing anything on purpose, no one wants to be sick. I just wanted to ensure that the little she ate was nutritious. I told her that if she is not able to eat, then at least drink the Glucerna shakes. She asked me why I was yelling at her if I didn’t think she was not eating on purpose. The last thing I said to her that night was, “Forget it, I won’t say anything to you anymore, do what you want!” The last thing she said to me was, “I should just go die”

Not our best moment, It’s a lose lose situation. She’s right, I’m not the one who is sick. But I am the one going through it ALL with her. Going forward, I told her that it’s important she is fully transparent with her doctors. Be honest about the hard days. My mom is such a prideful person, she hates appearing weak. If she was already annoyed with me chasing after her diet, she was really going to loathe me monitoring her glucose / insulin. All of this sucks, because as previously stated…cancer sucks! What can you do when life just seems to pile on and you feel completely out of control? I don’t know, but for us….we are going to just keep on fighting, one day, one challenge at a time.

Positive vibes and prayers appreciated.

Sky High to Rock Bottom

Wendy K.Leave a comment

My mom was doing great! She had completed 2 out of 6 infusions. She had started to gain weight. In between the infusion treatments, my mom was feeling good and even started to have an appetite. On 12/16/25, we received positive news. Her CA-124 (protein released into the blood by some cancer cells) level went from 876 to 191. The 191 result came from labs taken on 12/2/25 right before her second infusion, so that was the result of just one treatment! Her third infusion was scheduled for 12/30/25 and her oncologist scheduled a PET scan for 1/8/26. We would review the results of the PET scan with him on 1/15/26. Things were moving in the right direction.

Earlier in the year, I planned a trip to Nashville for my mom, sister, and I to attend the Amy Grant & Vince Gill Christmas Concert at The Ryman. I have fond childhood memories of my mom and step-father listening and singing along to Vince Gill songs. When my mom was diagnosed with cancer, I thought we might have to cancel the trip. However, her oncologist gave us the green light and said the timing of the trip should work out between her second and third treatments. We flew to Nashville on Friday, 12/19/22 and spent three nights in Tennessee. We visited the Country Music Hall of Fame, enjoyed the Christmas Concert at The Ryman Auditorium, hopped on the Trolley Tours, and took it easy and rested between activities and meals.

We returned home on 12/22/25 and the very next day we had family (two cousins and an aunt) from Taiwan fly in to visit my mom. It really meant a lot to my mom that they traveled so far to come and support her. We enjoyed Christmas together and they were wonderful company. She felt so much love. It was a great end to a stressful year.

On 12/30/25 my mom completed her third infusion treatment. Three days later, she stayed in bed and said she just felt tired. She slept a lot the next two days and by Sunday, 1/4/26 she was incoherent. I called the ambulance and she was taken to the ER. She had low potassium, low calcium, and was dehydrated. It was scary. The way she was acting, I was worried she had a stroke. I had no idea potassium was so important! My mom was incredibly weak, she could not sit up in the bed, she could not answer simple questions. I honestly didn’t know if she would survive. The ER pumped her full of all the things and by Monday, she was able to carry a conversation but still really weak. The staff kept asking if she used a wheelchair, walker, or cane at home. I told them she was walking up the stairs and driving before she was admitted into the hospital. I did not understand how she went from being completely independent to immobile. One of the nurses explained to me that all people will experience challenges with mobility if they lay in bed for a couple of days, but for elderly people, the decline is quick. I was horrified just how quickly my mom’s body had deteriorated.

On Tuesday (1/6/26) morning, when I arrived at the hospital, she was shaking and complained about being cold. Ten minutes later, she said she was really hot. Her doctor said that bacteria had popped up in her bloodwork, hinting at an infection. She was uncomfortable and looked worse than she did on Monday. I left that afternoon feeling really worried, I was not sure if my mom would ever be able to walk again. At the very least, she was definitely going to need physical therapy and more than likely would get sent to rehabilitation before she could return home.

When I returned later that day, I was shocked to find her bed empty and her sitting on the toilet. This crazy lady had disobeyed the nurse’s orders and gotten out of her bed and slowly made her way to the restroom by herself. I was SHOCKED! Even though I was upset that she was walking around on her own, I was so relieved to see her on her feet! She definitely still had some fight in her.

Marathon of Appointments

Wendy K.Leave a comment

On 11/4/2025, 64 Days, 2 Months, 5 Specialists, 20 Medical Appointments after my mom was discharged from the hospital; she received a formal diagnosis of Stage 3B Primary Peritoneal Carcinoma.

Training and running a marathon is time consuming, exhausting, and emotional but at the end of the 26.2 miles, you receive a medal. For us, we ended our marathon of medical appointments with a cancer diagnosis. I would say that knowing is definitely better than the unknown but yeah, cancer really does SUCK!

For more than 2 months, managing her healthcare was my full-time (part-time) job: countless calls to doctors, nurses, hospitals, labs, insurance, scheduling appointments, transporting her to and from all the appointments, and constant information sharing with all the various medical staff. I maintained an online calendar of all her medical appointments, carried around printouts of her medication, and kept a binder of all her medical records starting with her hospital discharge papers.

It would be unlikely that any patient going through all these health issues would be able to manage any of this on their own. Brain fog is often common. I am fortunate to have a strong network of family, friends, and coworkers to help support me and pick up my slack as my attention has been focused on my mom. I often think about others who are not as lucky and wonder what happens to those patients and families.

My advice for anyone going through health challenges:

  1. Do not accept poor service / care. If you have concerns or are unhappy, ask for a new doctor / nurse / etc.
    • The GI doctor assigned to my mom while she was in the hospital was disappointing. During our 9/18/25 follow up appointment with him, he spent the entire time looking at his phone and computer screen and he made my mom feel like a number on a piece of paper. We left that appointment with no answers, still thinking she had liver cirrhosis. I called her PCP that same day and requested a new GI referral. The PCP referred my mom to the GI doctor who she had visited earlier in the year for all her digestive issues. The experience with this other GI PA was night and day difference. She was warm, listened to us, and said she did not believe my mom had liver cirrhosis. She began questioning the results of the hospital discharge and ordered another paracentesis with a more comprehensive biopsy of the fluid than what the hospital GI doctor had ordered. This second GI office called on 10/7/25 to notify us that cancer cells were found in the fluid biopsy and referred us to an Oncologist.
  2. Scheduling appointments is exhausting. Sometimes the only available dates are so far out in the future. Ask for alternate locations or staff with earlier availability. Additionally, I encourage you to call the insurance companies to question and push authorizations through. Take an aggressive and proactive approach.
    • During the 2 months, I drove my mom all over the Houston area. We had appointments in Kingwood, Tomball, Woodlands, Spring. I asked for anything within a 50 mile radius. I made multiple calls to the insurance companies and Medicare. I also picked up imaging CDs and personally delivered them the same day in lieu of waiting for records to be sent by staff electronically or mailed. I genuinely feel that it made a huge difference in how quickly my mom was able to schedule appointments, complete all her tests / labs, and receive her first chemotherapy infusion treatment.
  3. Keep thorough notes of any interaction you have with nurses, doctors, different specialists, insurance companies, lab technicians, scheduling.
  4. Repeat the same information to EVERYONE. It is important to make sure everyone is aligned and every specialist, doctor, lab, knows everything you know.
  5. Advocate for yourself or your loved one with kindness and understanding. It is challenging not to take out our frustrations out on others, but important to keep in mind that everyone is working in the confines of their jobs. Several times, I felt that being nice to people made them more patient and willing to go the extra mile to help me or share helpful information that would push the process further along.
  6. Confide in trusted family / friends. Dealing with all of these health challenges can be overwhelming and isolating. Ask for help and take care of your own needs. It’s not selfish, it’s necessary!

The Ground Starts to Crack

Wendy K.Leave a comment

Are blogs still a thing? A few months ago, while commuting to work, I started thinking about keeping a journal to serve as a processing tool for myself. I decided to brush the cobwebs off this site and hijack it to use as an outlet. Maybe others will find my experiences helpful.

Here we go…

In March of 2024, while vacationing in New York for Spring Break, my mom started complaining about heartburn. The discomfort continued after we returned home, so she went to her doctor who suggested that she start taking Pepcid AC. After return visits with no improvement, my mom was eventually referred to a gastroenterologist (GI) who prescribed acid reflex medication, advised her to eat small meals, and avoid spicy or greasy foods. After numerous visits to her GI with no relief, she was informed that she had some gallstones. Her gallbladder was removed on July 26, 2024. She still continued to experience digestive challenges. She complained that her food felt like it would get stuck in her throat and she had to drink a lot of water to force it down. Her portions were so small and the variety of food she ate became so limited she was starting to lose weight. After a scan of her esophagus, she was told it was inflamed and was prescribed pantoprazole at the beginning of August 2025. After about 2 weeks of taking the pantoprazole, she started feeling tired and noticed her abdomen swelling. She did some research online and noticed that stomach swelling was a side effect of the medication so she decided to stop taking the medicine (RECOMMENDATION: speak with the prescribing doctor about any side effects you may be having prior to stopping said medication as some medications require the patient to wean off of it to prevent more adverse side effects)

After my mom discontinues the medicine, she continues to feel discomfort. After a visit with her primary care (PCP), the PA diagnoses her with a urinary tract infection (UTI) and prescribes antibiotics. At that time, she mentions that her abdomen felt swollen. The PA noted that she had gained 6 lbs. since the last time she had been seen and it was probably just weight gain. This was a dismissive response to her concern! When she told me his response, I decided I needed to get involved. I suggested going to the Emergency Room (ER) but she wanted to see if the antibiotics would help. She finished the antibiotics and could urinate without discomfort but still felt “off” so she scheduled a follow up appointment. I told her we should just go to the ER because she should not suffer over the weekend, but she insisted to wait for her scheduled doctor appointment on Monday.

On August 25th, 2025 I experienced first hand how challenging it is to navigate the US healthcare system. I took the day off work and went with my mom to her PCP appointment. I told him that her stomach swelling was abnormal. I questioned how the rest of her could look so gaunt and her stomach be so distended. Something was wrong. We brought up our concerns about the pantoprazole medication that she stopped taking. He recommended that she take magnesium citrate to relieve possible bloating and constipation and also submitted a referral for an abdominal CT scan. (RECOMMENDATION: ask for a printout of ALL the medications each doctor has on file). The PCP was naively hopeful that we would be able to get the CT scheduled that same day. After calls to the insurance company, the imaging center, and a request for an updated referral from the PCP, the earliest date we could schedule the CT scan was Thursday, August 28. (RECOMMENDATION: if you are planning to call the insurance company on behalf of a patient, request a HIPPA form to be mailed to the patient so they can fill it out and give you authorization to speak on their behalf. Their verbal authorization is only valid for 7 days).

On Thursday, 8/28/25, I take my mom to get a CT scan and the PCP gets the results and confirms that her abdomen is filled with fluid so asks her to come in and get some bloodwork done. She is told that they will call her with the results, probably on Monday. The PCP states that if she is not in any pain and does not have fever there is no need to go to the ER.

Fri. 8/29 -Before going to work, I check on my mom and she tells me she isn’t in pain but is feeling “weird” and had to take 2 Ibuprofen every couple of hours throughout the night. She was not in pain, just extremely uncomfortable. Also, my cousin got in touch with her and shared sad news that her sister had passed away earlier in the month. My brain cannot even process that news so we put a pin in that and I order her to get dressed so I can take her to the ER. The ER performs a CT scan and runs some bloodwork. The ER doctor notes her esophagus is incredibly inflamed and she has signs of liver and/or heart failure with dangerously low sodium levels (seizure inducing). She is admitted into the hospital. The hospital performs a paracentesis and extracts out 6.7 liters of fluid from my mother’s abdomen. When she was admitted into the hospital, she weighed 124, after the procedure, her weight was 109…what in the actual…?!? My mom received a voicemail from her PCP while we are in the ER. Apparently they received the bloodwork results and noticed the low sodium and recommended that my mom go to the ER immediately (ANNOYING).

It happened to be Labor Day weekend, so things moved slow at the hospital. During her hospital stay, she is seen by two specialists: a gastroenterologist and a nephrologist. The doctors will not release her, they continue bloodwork and monitoring and schedule an endoscopy procedure on Tuesday (9/2/25). Frustratingly enough, the endoscope showed nothing concerning so the doctor discharged my mom that same day. After 5 days in the hospital, they sent us on our merry way. The staff did not even offer her a wheelchair to the car. After days of being labeled a fall risk, they just expected her to walk herself all the way downstairs to the car…how bizarre!

Her hospital discharge paper was covered with scary words: Liver Cirrhosis, Congestive Heart Failure. My mom does not drink alcohol and aside from having diabetes and high blood pressure, her heart health has never been a concern. The hospital staff stabilized my mother and now we owned the responsibility to follow up with her PCP, gastroenterologist, & nephrologist. I had to request a cardiologist referral from the PCP, because for some reason even with the congestive heart failure note, the hospital had not assigned my mom a cardiologist during her hospital stay.